DISSOLVE – poem

As when you touch yourself for the first

time inside and out

Or when you have left without saying goodbye

for the last time and you do not know it yet

Like walking into a dark room where everything

is known and you are excited that

something alive and beautiful will brush

your face

Or I am the long tree whose branches

move gently wild from the wind

and leave marks on your face

that you will remember when you dream

and you will go back to stare for days

until your eyes ache

Like arms that nobody who has ever loved you

has had before or has held you more strong

than you will ever be held again

And you will weep because you know that

that is true.

(c) Jessan Dunn (DeCredico) Otis – 1985/1987 – CQ, California State Poetry Quarterly, Spring-Summer 1987, Volume 14, Number 1, p.11.

Breaking silence: we have work to do – essay

“Today, like every other day, we wake up empty/and frightened….” ~ Rumi

There are days when the world is too much with us – when the news reports are about the terrifying things we continue to do to each other, when an unexpected telephone call too early in the morning changes everything and there’s nothing you can do about it but pray (for a long time) and to show them you love them, when where you were once able to see beauty in that certain slant of light or find solace in the quietude of that sunset or the ocean; or, the enduring love of that person who gently tries to prod you back to your better self falls on your deaf heart.  A long-loved friend dies – you were better than sisters to each other. The drowning of another friend’s 3 year old son strikes another shattering blow.  Like a slug being hit by salt, you curl up, tight.

You know you’re in trouble; but, can’t find your way back.

Slowly, by constancy, grace, force of will and that invisible Love, a small chink finds its way in.  Belly laughs return. Someone you’ve reached out to after your long silence interrupts your conversation, prays for you, and your heart lifts a little – amen.

No one said this life would be easy; and, sometimes it’s not. But, it’s worth it – every time.

Gratitude.

~ Jessan

“…Everything/has to do with loving and not loving/This night will pass./Then we have work to do.” ~ Rumi

Thank You ~ many languages

Thank You ~ many languages

At This Time of the Turning of the Year – essay

At This Time of the Turning of the Year – essay

At this time of the turning of the year my thoughts go in two directions – turning back and turning forward.  Simultaneously, I stand exactly where and as I am in this moment.

Turning back, 2014 has been another year of continuing to become accustomed to not being able to hear my youngest sister’s laughter, to share a story of our adventures and expectations.  Until we meet, again, Genevieve – I love you and miss you, BabyGirl.  Your children and I will tell stories to your grandchildren of growing up together and of your gentleness and loving ways – part of your legacy.

2014 has, also, been a year of good, sometimes challenging, professional and personal work for me.  Collaborating with clients to create custom-crafted content, strategies, buffing and polishing existing content until it shines and communicates exactly, mentoring and more.  Good folks.  Good work.  Thank you for your confidence and continued support.  My special thanks to Adam J. Kovitz, an extra-ordinary Friend and collaborator.  Get this guy!

My personal work continues to shift, evolve, change, as it has since 1985.  My gratitude to all poets and writers who came before me is steadfast and enduring.  A particular nod of the head must go to Michael S. Harper, 1st Poet Laureate for the State of Rhode Island, through whose work, counsel, teachings and friendship I have been (and continue to be) enlarged, challenged, humbled, sustained.  Thank you, MSH.

Gratitude, also, for the blessings of love from my three SweetMen – Al, Sandro and Ces.  You enrich and sweeten my life; and, are loved more than you know.

In contrast, there were parts of 2014 that I would wish I never witnessed nor experienced.  Continued killings, hatreds, viciousness, turmoil, senseless slaughters, ongoing acts of unkindness.  Heartbreaking.  Destructive beyond all measure.  Repeating history.  Lessons not learned.

Once again I ask myself: “What is my part in this?”  I ask you: “What is your part in this?”

And, so its continues to go – another month turned, another year passes.

At this time of the turning of the year, I remember, rejoice, reflect and rejuvenate.  May the blessings and joy of loving and being loved by someone somewhere follow and sustain you throughout 2015.  May all your troubles be little ones; and, the wind always at your back.

#Happy2015

~ Jessan

IF WE… For ARO – poem

IF WE…                    

Big Red Heart

Big Red Heart

– For ARO

If we were not able to touch, as we do   If it

was not possible to share in the ways that

only you and I have made with each other

would we still love in the ways we do now?

 

If we had no apparent means of enjoying all our senses have encouraged us to explore

would we, still, love each other, as we do?

 

If we, unexpectedly, found ourselves, inexplicably, dumb-made, incapable to

communicate

the shades and variations and variables of how we love each other   would we continue,

as we have, to grow in it?

 

My reply is, simply, this   Your laughter is my rain, it nourishes me   Your tears, my tears

Your joy, my joy   beyond my breath.

 

(c) 12/3/04  Jessan Dunn Otis

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Happy Anniversary SweetMan ~

Love ( all ways),

~ Jessan

“3 x 3” – poem

3 x 3
Trees breathing
Breath condense
Morning mist
Jessan Dunn Otis (c) 12.21.2014

Magic Words – essay

Magic Words

Being raised as I was, there were three phrases or “Magic Words” that were consistently spoken and required – “Please”, “Thank you”, and “Excuse me”.

When I had children of my own, I taught them the same lessons I had been taught when I was growing up – both in our home and outside our home.

Over time, I’ve come to realize that what I came to believe was common courtesy is, often, not so common.  Nevertheless, the lessons I was taught about the “Magic Words” have persisted.

To this day, I hear my Mother’s and Father’s voice whenever I speak or write those words; and, I continue to wonder why they’ve, often, become so uncommon in life and in work.

Thanks, Mom and Dad, for teaching me one of many important, simple lessons.

Your Loving and Devoted Daughter,

~ Jessan

Thank You ~ many languages

Thank You ~ many languages

#ActsOfKindness – essay

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see. ~ Mark Twain #quote

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see. ~ Mark Twain #quote

#ActsOfKindness – essay

More and more, recently, it seems to me that what’s needed are more acts of simple courtesy and kindness. A smile to a stranger. The door held open for the next person behind you. A call and/or handwritten note to a loved one you know is not in such a good place today; or, to whom you’ve not reached out for too long. The simple “Please.” and “Thank you.”

With that in mind, via various social media, I’ve been posting with the hashtag #ActsOfKindness.

If you, like me, agree that our Big Blue Marble could use just a little more courtesy, a little more kindness, please be free to use and/or post using #ActsOfKindness.

Thanks, in advance and anticipation ~

~ Jessan

Before All Our Lives Began To Change – poem

BEFORE ALL OUR LIVES BEGAN TO CHANGE

Before all our lives began to change

time was stretched between holidays like

carnavale lights and summer lasted forever

every year until Labor Day mysteriously

arrived again to change living to another circle

 

It seemed we played all the time — hair cuts on

darby horses and watermelon seed fights, building

castles of sand and jelly fish oozing against the

jetties, discovering the nest holes of horseshoe

crabs below the high tide line, and snow forts drifted

three stories every January and February, sledding

hellions down Cooperstown Road, the cold and snowflakes

cutting younger cheeks, with the excruciating pleasure

to do it, again     Playing “I have a little umbrella,”

dragging the chair covers across the sand like dragon tails

or lizards or princesses     Shrieking to begin hide-and-seek,

crouched under the crocheted orange and blue and brown

comforter — dying to be found and hoping that we would

never be discovered, because that discovery always

ended in a serious session of being tickled until we

could not breathe

 

But, then, living changed us into other circles,

other places, other people.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Dedicated ~ In Love and Memory to: Barbara Dunn Blossom, Genevieve Dunn, Helen Smith Dunn, Mahlon H. Dunn, Jr., Tacy Dunn SanAntonio

(c) 1997 Jessan Dunn (DeCredico) Otis ~ RHODE ISLAND WOMEN SPEAK: An Anthology of Authors and Artists, The Rhode Island Committee, The National Museum of Women in the Arts (NMWA), Ed. Rosemary W. Prisco, p.19.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

White Butterflies

White Butterflies

Before All Our Lives Began To Change – narrative

Before All Our Lives Began to Change – narrative

In every life there are times that drive us back inside ourselves, that cause us to remember people, places, events that may have been met, passed through and/or witnessed many years earlier; and, to reflect upon those remembrances from a different point of view.

In particular, the past year and a half has been another period of that kind of reflection in my life.  Often, these times a hard.  Frequently triggered by a loss.  That is true with me.

I write about this not from the point of pity but, rather, with gratitude.  It’s been another kind of refining, tempering and becoming more clear, less “cluttered” and closer (still) to my truer self – a life-long process.

This is just to say that if you, too, have been suffering, felt lost, are confused or are in a moment of pain and seek peace – keep searching, go to those “hard places” that only you truly know about your life, open your Spirit to the simple beauty that is always available.

No one ever told me this living would be easy.  I’m not telling you that either.

What I’m saying is face your fears (they are illusions).  Embrace (wholeheartedly and openly) your pain.  Call it by name, deal with it and, then, move on to the better parts that are waiting for you to arrive.

What I’m continually reminded of when I re-emerge from these times is that the singular gifts of love, light and laughter are always available, it is a choice to receive or reject them.

In gratitude,

~ Jessan

The Cambridge Poem

T H E  C A M B R I D G E  P O E M ~ #poetry

 

Commencement Address – Class of 1990 – The Cambridge School, Weston, MA

 

Give your regards when you go to the reunion and at the dinner,

say that you were thinking about them     They’ll, eventually, recall

your name; you went to the movies with that one, felt the weight

of their life when they sat next to you – they never said a word

 

All of you are rising friends: one used to play the piano, one once

wrote a play, one even seemed awakened enough to photograph the

fields as the unencumbered with tutored minds and unrehearsed passions

 

Meet them at the door, they’ve brought the souvenirs of time; a seashell

from the Pacific, the nose of a marble saint, and from the field

a spent casing divulged from the flower bed

 

Face a rising world bearing its gifts in its hands, kiss your incidental

dreams – rise, move away, take others

 

Give your regards to the well­-protected; you knew them, you went

to school together     There’s something to bury when you begin

to move away     When you are ready and rich in your wish for the

world, you have a new race to start

 

From the heart of this darkened quadrangle, I hear the library

hum, an immense chorus of writers murmur inside their books along

the unlit, alphabetical shelves; each one stitched into their

own private coat, (you will have to write your own) together forming

a continuous, enormous breath of language

 

I picture a figure in the act of reading, shoes on the desk, head tilted

into the wind, a person in two worlds, holding the nape of their neck

as another’s life saturates the page; or, in the middle of a thesis,

moving from paragraph to verse, touring endless rooms (you will have to  write your own)

 

I hear the voice of my mother and father reading and inside their

voices lay other, distant sounds

I see us reading ourselves away from ourselves, straining in circles of

light to find more light until the line of words becomes a trail

that we follow across a page and you will have to listen hard to

hear the voices going away (and, you will have to write your own).

© 1990 Jessan Dunn (DeCredico) Otis